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LEO, rockin'on JAPAN interview (May Issue, 2023) (Summary by shizuna)
rockin'on JAPAN did a seven-month long feature on each of the BE:FIRST members in their magazine. LEO was featured in the May, 2023 issue.
(They did an interview with all the members together in the following month, lol)
Note: These interviews with rockin'on JAPAN were released only in print, so I specifically bought this issue knowing it's LEO's turn. (The things we do for our oshis)
This rockin'on JAPAN issue can be purchased via Amazon (Japan) or rockin'on JAPAN's website. So if you're interested and able to, please get yourself a copy! :)
LEO felt he grew a lot as an artist going on this tour. While he's still jealous of the image of an "ideal artist" he has in his head, he thinks he is carving out who he is as an artist. During the tour, he listened to music a lot and grew closer to music. He took photos (his #l_camera series), and journaled a lot (practice conveying his thoughts in words). He was happy he could perform and tour with the members, but he was also in anguish; from two things:
- One being the mental and emotional block he had around 19-20 yo (avex trainee period) resurfacing. It was subtle and he didn’t even notice he was still carrying this with him.
When he was a avex trainee...
- Saw the dark side of human nature for the first time and it really scared him.
- He was afraid to voice his opinions when given an exercise or lesson; felt like saying “yes” was the ‘right’ thing to do.
- In turn, he felt that his vocals were stiff and he couldn’t convey his emotions well (even in his day-to-day - he wasn’t smiling a lot and when members gave him gifts for his birthday he didn’t know how to be happy about it)
Due to what happened, LEO described it as putting those feelings in a box, and left his wounds to bleed over time.
He was still somewhat in this state during THE FIRST, as BE:FIRST, and while on tour
- RyonRyon sensei noticed this, telling him he wasn’t showing emotion (when he sings).
- He spoke earnestly with RyonRyon sensei about it, with RyonRyon sensei telling him it is OK and he should let [his emotions] all out.
- Although LEO understood what RyonRyon sensei meant, it took a while for him to understand what that means physically (what to do with his body).
- As a former baseballer, he described this as “yips”, a sudden inability to throw the ball; do something accurately
- However, ever since that conversation with RyonRyon sensei, LEO has been able to convey emotion more easily
By the time BE:FIRST performed at Yoyogi, and esp. during “Message” and seeing the fans and the penlights, LEO felt like this is where he belonged and is what he’s meant to do.
The mental and emotional block slowly dissolved the longer he spent in THE FIRST, BE:FIRST and BMSG; where the environment, staff, and members allowed him to feel he could express his opinions freely.
The other source of anguish is how he feels he has no personality of his own compared to the other six members. For a long time, he felt that he needed to be the “glue” that holds the others together. (People hold this image of him, and he thought that of himself too)
- Before, he thought BE:FIRST needed to be on one path together. Through the tour, he realised that they don't all need to be on ONE BE:FIRST path.
- He also realised that BE:FIRST could be a heptagon*, with all members completing something another cannot, including himself
- Realised that he didn't need to do certain things and they will still be OK.
- LEO felt like he was half a step behind the others, but he feels he’s finally on the same level as everyone else
*On the heptagon comment: In checking interviews from 2021 and prior to the BE:1 Tour, LEO would often say that BE:FIRST is a hexagon and he is the pillar / glue that holds everyone together.
Other things:
- His dad taught him, "don't try to be cool, BE cool" so he lives by that too. His own interpretation of that is "a cool guy with good human qualities is cool". He brings up a time when a teacher in school was scolding his friend. He thought the teacher was in the wrong, and talked back to the teacher. Another time, he got angry at a classmate for saying, "you shouldn't make a job out of what you love". He was working very hard in becoming an artist at the time, and thought the classmate was wrong, so he declared in class that he "will definitely become a musician / artist". LEO is glad he did eventually become an artist or it would've been very uncool, lol.
- LEO thinks he’s the only one who looks back on photos with the members, lol
- As one of the goals LEO wrote in his plan as a trainee, he clearly remembers writing “standing on a Dome stage by 25”
- The studio where he practiced as an avex trainee was close to Yoyogi Stadium
- While LEO was in the midst of anguish, boss told him that he didn’t think LEO would get [recover from his “yips”] here this soon. LEO was still struggling so he lashed out at boss. LEO visited boss’s house on New Year’s Day intending to apologize but boss only said, “No I didn’t do anything.” LEO once again felt like he was accepted as he is and he is glad he has decided to follow boss.
- LEO thinks he is a pain in the ass (because he’ll point something out if it feels wrong; if there’s trash lying around he’ll ask who left it there) and can be rather cringe (since he’ll ask members if they wanna hang out a lot, and says “i love u” to the members a lot)
Please note I translate these for free, so they may not be super perfect.
Retranslations or sharing of the summaries is fine! For retranslations, please notify me beforehand and credit once posted!
(They did an interview with all the members together in the following month, lol)
Note: These interviews with rockin'on JAPAN were released only in print, so I specifically bought this issue knowing it's LEO's turn. (The things we do for our oshis)
This rockin'on JAPAN issue can be purchased via Amazon (Japan) or rockin'on JAPAN's website. So if you're interested and able to, please get yourself a copy! :)
On BE:1 TOUR
LEO felt he grew a lot as an artist going on this tour. While he's still jealous of the image of an "ideal artist" he has in his head, he thinks he is carving out who he is as an artist. During the tour, he listened to music a lot and grew closer to music. He took photos (his #l_camera series), and journaled a lot (practice conveying his thoughts in words). He was happy he could perform and tour with the members, but he was also in anguish; from two things:
- One being the mental and emotional block he had around 19-20 yo (avex trainee period) resurfacing. It was subtle and he didn’t even notice he was still carrying this with him.
When he was a avex trainee...
- Saw the dark side of human nature for the first time and it really scared him.
- He was afraid to voice his opinions when given an exercise or lesson; felt like saying “yes” was the ‘right’ thing to do.
- In turn, he felt that his vocals were stiff and he couldn’t convey his emotions well (even in his day-to-day - he wasn’t smiling a lot and when members gave him gifts for his birthday he didn’t know how to be happy about it)
Due to what happened, LEO described it as putting those feelings in a box, and left his wounds to bleed over time.
He was still somewhat in this state during THE FIRST, as BE:FIRST, and while on tour
- RyonRyon sensei noticed this, telling him he wasn’t showing emotion (when he sings).
- He spoke earnestly with RyonRyon sensei about it, with RyonRyon sensei telling him it is OK and he should let [his emotions] all out.
- Although LEO understood what RyonRyon sensei meant, it took a while for him to understand what that means physically (what to do with his body).
- As a former baseballer, he described this as “yips”, a sudden inability to throw the ball; do something accurately
- However, ever since that conversation with RyonRyon sensei, LEO has been able to convey emotion more easily
By the time BE:FIRST performed at Yoyogi, and esp. during “Message” and seeing the fans and the penlights, LEO felt like this is where he belonged and is what he’s meant to do.
The mental and emotional block slowly dissolved the longer he spent in THE FIRST, BE:FIRST and BMSG; where the environment, staff, and members allowed him to feel he could express his opinions freely.
The other source of anguish is how he feels he has no personality of his own compared to the other six members. For a long time, he felt that he needed to be the “glue” that holds the others together. (People hold this image of him, and he thought that of himself too)
- Before, he thought BE:FIRST needed to be on one path together. Through the tour, he realised that they don't all need to be on ONE BE:FIRST path.
- He also realised that BE:FIRST could be a heptagon*, with all members completing something another cannot, including himself
- Realised that he didn't need to do certain things and they will still be OK.
- LEO felt like he was half a step behind the others, but he feels he’s finally on the same level as everyone else
*On the heptagon comment: In checking interviews from 2021 and prior to the BE:1 Tour, LEO would often say that BE:FIRST is a hexagon and he is the pillar / glue that holds everyone together.
Other things:
- His dad taught him, "don't try to be cool, BE cool" so he lives by that too. His own interpretation of that is "a cool guy with good human qualities is cool". He brings up a time when a teacher in school was scolding his friend. He thought the teacher was in the wrong, and talked back to the teacher. Another time, he got angry at a classmate for saying, "you shouldn't make a job out of what you love". He was working very hard in becoming an artist at the time, and thought the classmate was wrong, so he declared in class that he "will definitely become a musician / artist". LEO is glad he did eventually become an artist or it would've been very uncool, lol.
- LEO thinks he’s the only one who looks back on photos with the members, lol
- As one of the goals LEO wrote in his plan as a trainee, he clearly remembers writing “standing on a Dome stage by 25”
- The studio where he practiced as an avex trainee was close to Yoyogi Stadium
- While LEO was in the midst of anguish, boss told him that he didn’t think LEO would get [recover from his “yips”] here this soon. LEO was still struggling so he lashed out at boss. LEO visited boss’s house on New Year’s Day intending to apologize but boss only said, “No I didn’t do anything.” LEO once again felt like he was accepted as he is and he is glad he has decided to follow boss.
- LEO thinks he is a pain in the ass (because he’ll point something out if it feels wrong; if there’s trash lying around he’ll ask who left it there) and can be rather cringe (since he’ll ask members if they wanna hang out a lot, and says “i love u” to the members a lot)
Please note I translate these for free, so they may not be super perfect.
Retranslations or sharing of the summaries is fine! For retranslations, please notify me beforehand and credit once posted!